Hell City, Chapter 9: “Escape in the Tune of D”

Hell City

Chapter 9: “Escape in the Tune of D

Hell City is our weekly comic book type superhero detective noir thing
by our good friend in LA, Tim!

 

 

           

Little Dipper had officially initiated me into his gang.

The process was torturous. It involved having to read his bullshit screenplay and then dancing around naked in front of a mute Indian chief.

Regardless I was officially a Knucklehead. Sure the name didn’t exactly inspire fear but q-tips speak. Usually the phrase is money speaks but in jail money don’t mean a thing and q-tips are king.

At lunch Little Dipper introduced me to the rest of the members of the gang. There was Sprout, a tiny little fellow who had big dreams to one day be a world famous flower-puncher. Jimmy Jack was a lumberjack of a man if there ever was one, the only thing more ferocious than his beard was his ability to swing an axe or axe-like objects. Schlonger was the original party animal, he didn’t bring much to the team but we all wanted to hang out with him on the outside. And finally there was Rusty Chunckle. He was the brains behind the whole operation. He didn’t say much but when he did talk it was usually to insult you.

“So now that we all know each other what do you say you tell me about this plan to bust out?” I asked my new crew.

“Well? What do you say boys, should we tell him?” Little Dipper asked everyone.

“Why tell him… when we can sing it to him?” Rusty replied.

“That’s okay I’d actually rather you just tell me.” I could tell by their smiles though that my request was falling on deaf ears. What happened next was kind of weird. All the Knuckleheads lined up and started to sing and dance in unison.

 

We’re bustin’ out
We’re breakin’ out
We gotta gooooooooooo

 

When you’re a young male
You can’t be stuck in jail
Going crazy in your cell
Stuck inside a living hell

Sick of waiting for the man
Decided to come up with a plan
And now we gotta say that

 

We’re bustin’ out! We’re breakin’ out! We gotta gooooooooo!

 

Sprout made us knives out of weeds and other knives
We’ll use those to take the guards lives
Then dress up in their skin
It’s a plan that’s sure to win
And now we gotta say

 

We’re bustin’ out
We’re breakin’ out
We gotta go

 

“So? What do you think?” Rusty asked.

“Uh…” I stuttered as they all looked at me. I just knew I’d break their tiny little hearts if I wasn’t down with their plan.

“S’good… it’s good.”

 

 

 

Like what you see? Tim also does a comic strip every Monday at www.thehiggsweldon.com and writes and illustrates his own kickass comic book, Goatman. Check it out here: Facebook.com/goatmancomics!



Tim Vargulish

Tim is a contributor for UnSceneComedy.com